Surviving Suicide

 

They call us “survivors” and that’s a good word, right?

It sure beats the other extreme and most who survive some calamity

are no doubt grateful to be one.

We are in a special class of survivors.

We are known as “suicide survivors” but no matter how you slice it,

suicide is an ugly, repulsive word.

We are not in a category that brings relief.

We are in a class of people who survive unbearable,

painful loss ~ one day at a time. One day at a time.

Perhaps you are one of us; we are millions strong.

We are parents, siblings, friends, relatives, co-workers, and school chums.

The list is endless.

Our loved one touched so many lives, just like yours.

Why are we millions strong? Because every fifteen + minutes

in the USA alone, someone reaches the point of no return

and ends his life.

Perhaps you had just said “talk with you later” on the phone

or you sent a text message or an e-mail.

Perhaps you had made plans to play golf the next week

or go out to lunch.

Perhaps you were making plans to celebrate a birthday together

or take a trip.

And just that quickly, all plans, hopes, and dreams

vanished into thin air

sucking the breath out of your lungs along with them.

No time to prepare.

No time to ask questions or seek advice or suggest help

for the one you love.

One day he appears fine and the next day he is gone.

No goodbyes.

No understanding why.

Nothing left but emptiness, pain, heartbreak, and despair.

Why, Lord? Why?

~from “Shattered by Suicide” by Gracie Thompson

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13 thoughts on “Surviving Suicide

  1. Gracie, such a heartfelt piece of writing about trying to live on, even exist, after losing a loved one to suicide. Twenty-six years on, I still look everyday at the photo of my smiling nephew who took his life when he was twenty-five. A great guy for whom living was just too much in spite of having what seemed like everything.
    To lose a son is the unimaginable but I know for you, it;s the awful reality and my heart breaks for you and all those he left behind. I just want you to know that my thoughts are very much with you as you battle along. Please never feel alone. jx

    • Dear Socialbridge,

      Your tender words are filling my love cup as we speak. Thank you for sharing your story. There is more and I would love to hear it. You can always write me at: impossiblejoy@yahoo.com which is my private ministry email address. So sorry for the loss of your nephew to suicide. You still remember. You still care and you must be a great support to your family. We never forget. Others don’t speak our son’s name – just too painful (they fear for us) I suppose, but I so wish they would! Keep in touch. Keep reading the blogs if you like. It’s nice to get comments. ~Gracie

  2. Reblogged this on Little Blog of Letting Go and commented:
    For me, the last words I said to him were, “call me as soon as you get home.” The last time I saw him alive was in my rear view mirror as I drove away. He looked sad, and I … almost … turned the car around. But, I was running late for work. “He’ll be fine,” I thought. “I can’t afford to lose any more time…”

    • Oh, the agony and the ecstasy of the rear view mirror! The shoulda, woulda, couldas of our lives. I know the second guessing. I know the pain of realizing I could have been a better mother to the realization that I could not save him. If we could turn back time, we would have a practice run at life and we’d change things. Unlike movie making, we don’t get take after take. We get no rule book. But, we have the ultimate Guide in our loving heavenly Father. He’s my everything. Thanks for reblogging. Blessings as you continue your journey. We are never alone. ~Gracie

    • Yes indeed, Carrie. Bless your heart. I am so sorry for your loss. Your story is so special. Thank you for sharing it. Let’s agree to keep our hands in the hand of the one who will never leave us or forsake us.

      • You are welcome! Come back often, Carrie. You book cover is so intriguing. It’s not in soft cover? I don’t have Kindle, but many do. I pray that many will read your story. Thank you for writing it. It is not an easy assignment, but I found writing mine helping in the healing process.

        Blessings,
        Gracie

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